The Spoken Nerd
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2012
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents...
The Spoken Nerd: Geeky Stories by Dorky People
An evening of story tellers sharing true tales from real nerds!
The Spoken Nerd is a celebration of the great and noble art form of story telling...but from a very geeky point-of-view. Each show has a theme and each invited guest story teller shares a true and personal story based on that theme. Sometimes the stories are funny, sometimes they're not. Sometimes the stories are serious, sometimes they're not. However, they are always explorations of the human condition immersed in tons of pop-culture. Both theatrical and intimate The Spoken Nerd strives to give a voice to the comic book/gamer/sci fi/science dork in all of us.
But more than than just stories, every show will have non-story artists! Magicians, practical science demonstrations, sideshow artists, string theory lectures, jugglers and Nerd Core Hip Hop will share the stage from time to time. And all of this will come together in an epic nerd stew of awesome.
**COMING SOON** Steampunk Burlesque
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2012
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents...
Clock Tease: A Steam Powered Boobie Show
An evening of ecdysiastic wonders and gyrational delights to tickle your ether fevered senses!
(Season 3 :: 2012)
**COMING SOON** Holy S#!t...Batman Returns!
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2012
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents...
Holy S#!t...Batman Returns!
The Sequel to the Extremely Popular Batman Burlesque Show.
(Season 3 :: 2012)
**COMING SOON** Harry Potter Burlesque
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2012
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents...
Harry Potter: A Magic Filled Spectacle of Naked Wizardry!
We've got your Horcrux...we've got it right here!
(Season 3 :: 2012)
DC vs. Marvel


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2011
Face front, true believers!
Epic Win Burlesque continues to be the nerdiest burlesque show in town, having staged such shows as Video Game Vixens, Cartoons, Holy Shit…Batman, Ghostbusters, Rated R for Violence and The Star Debate: Trek vs. Wars since forming in 2009.
In this show the naked nerds of EW will once again clash in civil war to settle another of our oldest arguments: Which comic book company is superior? DC or Marvel? Arguing on behalf of Team Marvel will be nerd rapper Schaffer the Darklord and his team of marvelous maidens Lefty Lucy, BB Heart, Mary Cyn and Fem Appeal. Leading the arguments for Team DC will be vaudevillian Nelson Lugo with "evidence" provided by DC darlings Iris Explosion, Magdalena Fox, Victoria Privates and Cherry Pitz. Since our hosts will play the parts of opposing counsel, our audience will play the part of jury. Indeed, the "winner" will be determined by your vote.
This sexy symposium will settle a feud that has raged since the Golden Age of comics. Laser vision will clash with web shooters. Mutants will wrestle Titans. Origin stories will be retold in reboots. And although there can be only one victor, all of the nerds in attendance will unite and rejoice in the super heroic splendor that is sexy burlesque ladies. The battle has begun...again. ‘Nuff said.
Epic Win Burlesque presents DC vs. Marvel
A Naked Battle of Heroic Proportions
Up! Up! And Excelsior!
RATED R FOR VIOLENCE
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2011
“RATED R FOR VIOLENCE.” Bloodthirsty hosts Nelson Lugo and Schaffer the Darklord will honor unforgettable scenes from some of cinema’s most violent classics with a little tassel-twirling help from EPIC WIN stars BB Heart, Lefty Lucy, Mary Cyn, Victoria Privates, Fem Appeal and Nasty Canasta. This messy evening will feature blood-soaked acts based on such films as A Clockwork Orange, Carrie and American Psycho, to name a few.
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents “RATED R FOR VIOLENCE.” This sexy tribute to violent movies promises to be both a bloody good time and an all-out bloodbath. You may wish to dress (or undress) accordingly.
There will be blood. LOTS of it.
-EW!
The Star Debate: Trek vs. Wars
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2010
Nerdlings,
The geeks of EW! will clash against one another in civil war to settle one of the most impassioned nerd arguments of our time: Which science fiction franchise is superior, Star Trek or Star Wars? Leading the arguments for Team Trek will be vaudevillian Nelson Lugo, with "evidence" provided by Trekkie hotties Bonnie Voy’age, Lefty Lucy, Miss Mary Cyn and special guest Fem Appeal. Arguing on behalf of Star Wars will be nerd rapper Schaffer the Darklord and his team of sultry Siths BB Heart, Victoria Privates, Magdalena Fox and special guest Rosey La Rouge. Since our hosts will be playing the parts of opposing counsel, our audience will play the part of jury. Indeed, the "winner" will be determined by your vote.
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents "The Star Debate: Trek vs. Wars." This sexy symposium will settle the great nerd argument once and for all. Phasers will clash with lightsabers. Klingons will battle Stormtroopers. Tribbles will wrestle Ewoks. And although there can be only one victor, all of the nerds in attendance will unite and rejoice in the majestic spectacle of space boobs. The battle has begun.
May the force live long and prosper.
GHOSTBUSTERS!
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2009
People of New York!
The shameless geeks of EPIC WIN pay homage to one of the most beloved popcorn flicks of all time, the 1984 Ivan Reitman masterpiece "Ghostbusters." Paranormal investigators Nelson Lugo and Schaffer the Darklord will host an expedition into the creepiest corners of New York City in search of things that go bump-n-grind in the night. Your PKE meters will spike as the boys encounter sexy and spooky performances from the likes of some of the greatest NYC burlesque superstars!
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents “GHOSTBUSTERS!” This titillating tribute to the oft-quoted classic promises nerdery and nudity with appearances from Zuul, Gozer, the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man and many other foxy full-torso apparitions. Don't cross the streams.
Who you gonna cat-call?
Holy Sh*t...BATMAN!
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2009
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents "Holy Sh*t...BATMAN!" A tassel-twirling tribute to the Dark Knight's friends and foes.
The four-eyed foxes of EW will continue to shamelessly celebrate nerdy delights by writing a love letter. To whom, you ask? To Batman. Yes, *that* Batman, an iconic character whose pop culture presence has spanned comic books, movies, television, cartoons and even video games. Indeed, this month the EPIC WIN crew expands the Dark Knight’s reach by introducing yet another entertainment venue for Batman to explore...the world of burlesque!
Dark, brooding vaudevillian hero Nelson Lugo and pale, maniacal nerdcore rapper Schaffer the Darklord host a tour through Gotham City’s underbelly in which the shadiest nemeses from Batman’s rogues gallery receive revealing interpretations from the likes of NYC burlesque finest superstars!
EPIC WIN Burlesque presents, “Holy Sh*t...BATMAN!” This tassel-twirling tribute to the Dark Knight’s friends and foes promises mystery, nerdery and nudity with titillating cameos from Catwoman, Harley Quinn, Poison Ivy and many, many more. See you in the asylum, clowns.
HA HAhA HahaHA HaHA HahaHAhahA HA ha HA!
-EW!
CARTOONS!
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2008
Following up on the success of the "Video Games Vixens" shows, co-hosts/producers/nerds Nelson Lugo and Schaffer the Darklord return with a fresh installment of EPIC WIN! This time around, the boys and girls celebrate cartoons and the brightly-colored foxes that star in them. Pour a bowl of Cap’N Crunch and gather 'round the boob tube because EPIC WIN is gonna party like it’s Saturday morning!
Video Game Vixens
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2008
Bringing the flame-warring camps of Casual and Hardcore gamers together, EPIC WIN BURLES presents "VIDEO GAME VIXENS: An Evening Of 8-Bit Boobies And Pixilated Pasties" a burlesque show like no other.
Schaffer The Darklord (aka STDNYC @ PSN) and Nelson Lugo (PieManAlaMode @ XBLA) will host an epic evening of some of the most elite waggle performers Gotham has to offer. An evening filled with music, laughs and magic... but mostly, scantily clad burlesque beauties as they pay homage to some of our most beloved electronic interactive entertainments. Pwning the stage with their own brand of konami code this show promises to be so full of win.
VIDEO GAME VIXENS will also be featuring a bonus stage where Nelson Lugo will perform a magic trick that will once and for all settle the question of whether or not there is in fact "cake”. But that is not all... there are also new levels and bigger maps featuring a Schaffer The Darklord original song. And to top it all off there is even a multiplayer component called "The Rock Band Burlesque After-Party". No subscription required but there will be micro-transactions in the form of a video game inspired raffle. As a pre-order bonus, everyone will receive a **+3 awesome** to their status – so come for the boobies... stay for the cake... stay later for the Rock Band with boobies while eating cake.
No matter what flavor of gamer you are, be it casual or hardcore, I think what we can all agree on is that the best kind of boobies are Geek Boobies.